Boop boop boop.. Haven't blogged here in a while. Actually, I haven't blogged much. I've got a life thats why haha jk I know these thingies are for ..Whatever.

Anywho, a lot's happened since last time I wrote.. Dangg, the parking lot crew went their separate ways. Freakingg.. Shit everybody is in their own little secluded area/cars. Folks is stupid. Letting ONE COUPLE'S breakup lead to a separation of a whole friendship. Well here's what I say --FUCK THEM. But it's cool though because no one's really talking to the dude.

DRAMA. Some people in hula cant keep their shit strait, like to talk shit, start shit, mess with shit. Ughh jeez. No wonder why NOBODYS talkin to her ass. Shit, sometimes seein girl at practice makes me just wanna laugh at her fuckin face but you know what? Im gettin too old to be talkin a dumbass girl down. Come practice time, Im there to dance and have fuckin fun. If she wants to keep actin shady well then thats her shit. Everybody knows she got issues, literally. No pointin sayin she got common sense because she really doesn't. And sometimes, I do feel bad for the girl but shit.. I thought she was actually cool. Well at one point she was. But knowing that one of the 'unwritten rules' that you dont really HAVE to be friends with everybody in the group.. Well that shit couldn't be any more right. But hey you can't blame me, my first reactions to hearing what she had to tell me caught me off guard. I was mad, upset, crying, all that shit. And what hurts the most is that somebody used my feelings to their own advantage.

Fucked up huh?

Well, unless girl wants to apologize to me, there isnt A DAMN THING I can do that would ever include her.

But its whatever. I just have to keep in mind about how blessed I am that I don't have what she has, and that I don't have to stoop to a level so low that it would make people hate me.

Im grown. I don't need people like her to bring me down .And its funny. She's only  A YEAR younger than i am. Ahh man.. Which doesn't process right in my head because a year ago when i was her age i wasn't acting like a little bitch.

And even if I did, I was a bitch with some class haha

Niccce.

..But anywhooo. Nowadays, it's all about thee last month of school. Next event I got comin up is Prom. Looooovely. =]

Oh yes, there will be an FHS talent rally comin up next month as well and auditions for it come up May 2. PreeeeTY soon! I asked Anutie Bern if it was cool ferr me to perform. Pretty much welcomed the thought! Haha Just as long as I'd mention it to her that it'd be okay then..It'd be okay! Haha But yeah, hella hyped up. Get to end my senior year as the girl with the motor butt hahahaha

Next thursday, April 26th I get my wisdom teeth taken out. ALL FOUR! Yikesss. Well its no biiig. Happens to lossa folk at this time and age.

Senior trip, sunset, gradnite, aaaand graduation are all coming up as well. Im so excited.. YESS!

As for college. Idc where I go, Solano to Sac. Long as I get my education righhht!? Yes

18th birthday is coming up tooo!. Can't wait to buy my first pack of cigarettes Ill never use!.. Buy prown I'll never watch.. And Go to clubs I'll never.. JUST KIDDING! Meet me in the cluuuub ITS GOIN DOWNN! Yes.

And after school is all done and over with I've got SpamJam in Monterey, and my 12 day trip to ITALYY BABY! Ready to hit the european nightclubs haha That'll be one unforgettable experience =]

Mayy is so my month;]

This shit's gettin old REAL quick. Im gettin tired of blowin over hella stupid shit. Yeah I know im half to blame here but fuck dude.

Just like I said in the other blog I wrote hella long ago. I don't like getting my hopes up at all dude. Bkuz I know it'll just go down the drain and then I get let down.

Hope he'll find me.

Wish I had other shit to keep me occupied. Knowhamtombout? Lol that was hella ugly. Ahh shit man. I needa go on vacation somewhere AWAY from Fairfield/Vacaville/whereverthefuckyouwanacallit.

I hate getting my hopes up, because in the end the surprise isn't much a surprise anymore.

I hate it when I make plans with someone and they go up and 180 me last minute. Thanks for letting me know!!

I hate when people lie to me. I'll smell you out but won't say anything unless you have the balls to tell me. The more you hold out on shit the worse you look to me.

I dont like it when people don't appreciate what I do for them because they don't notice it.

I hate how much of a sucker I am in certain situations.

I hate being proved wrong.

I hate being wrong.

I don't like crying --it leads to raw skin under yerr eyes.

I don't like being all alone by myself.

I hate being ignored.

I hate how people have such fabulous days when mine are awful.

I hated it when she said I ask for too much. Bitch?

I hate it when people don't listen to me. And not just listen but UNDERSTAND what Im saying.

I hate it when I call somebody or they call me for some small talk bullshit. Unless you needa talk to me, then dont waste my time.

I hate they way people make me feel, like Im obligated to talk to them.

I don't like not being filled in.

I don't like being left out.

I dont like it when people have alllll sorts of joy in the world when Im not. Especially when they rant on about it. Sorry but I take it as shoving it in my face.

I know its wrong but sometimes I like making people mad because it makes me feel good.

I hate it that when I depend on some people, they aint there for me like they told me. Some friends you guys are.

OKAY, SHIT!

For everyone that wants to knowww.. Ainokea is pidgen for I don't care, also meaning that I do what I like. Something that I caught on while doing some island searching on the Internet.

But anyways, here's my notion of it's meaning. I try to live life as carefree as possible. No stress, no buggin. To not care so much about shit sometimes. Bkuz I noticed that if I don't I wind up in some hard drama, serrrrrious!

Only things that matter to me right now are what I've gotta prioritize in my life. What's kinda funny is that of all the times I've neglected school and my work, Im catching onto it now. And the best part of it is that when Im down and focused everything, else just goes away. I kinda like that feeling. Knowing that even for that hour and a half im in my anatomy class er my government class, all em hard feelings n thoughts just bug out somewhere else. All the drama is left out the door. When I've got my mind busy on other things I tend not to be so upset or stressed all the time. So now, really the only thing Im stressin on is school. --But hey who doesnt? But like Im saying tho.. When my face is in a book or in some math problem, all of the other problems in my life just go away.

Even when Im reading a book on my own time, shit goes away. As if im in some other place, some other reality. I should've done this years ago! I think my life would've been 10x's better than it is now lol ..Ohh I feel like a nerd. haha

But anyways, when life sucks blue balls..

Ainokea.

Very good day today.

Anatomy/Physiology was fun! Well sorta. Im sloooowly starting to jump back into writing down DOZENS of notes. I think Im gonna buy a voice recorder to record my teacher's lectures. Honestly I think it'll save me that callus bump on my finger haha ..I just wonder how much it is!

Government was boring. Idk bkuz Mr. Petullo is a cool teacher but sometimes his jokes are kind of lame. He tries to pull of the Im old but Im hip act.. And its sorta feels like how your younger sibling tries to be old and matur elike you are.. Yeahh, like that.

Yearbook was cool. Im THE Secretary of the yearbook club. Not much to do I guess. The only reason why I was appointed the position is bkuz Mrs Link just happened to see my computer already logged on. So she told me to log onto Word. And blah blah

After that I spent the rest've my day with my sweetness! Nothin but cuddling laughing and jokin around.

Went back to my house so I could get a change of clothes bkuz I was lookn scruffy. Raf and Tracey were home which was cool. I went to go change upstairs and I heard Reg and Tracey talkn. Then my mom joined in..Then Mark and I. It was one BIG hearty conversation. When Reg and I left he was like I've never seen your mom that happy. LOL -She took a good nap

Then we headed back to his house so he could change and headed over to Mel's diner.

Good day, good day.